Earnest Hearts

Happy Valentine’s Day!  Love looks different than what many want or hope for.

Love gets embellished, meaning, in our desire for it to look different to others than what it is, or what we’re experiencing at the moment, we embellish it, camouflaging the reality.  We show pictures of the flowers, candy, and dinners while the messy part of life continues. There’s nothing wrong with the tangibles, as long as we don’t exaggerate their importance and ignore the deeper side of love.  At the end of the day, when two people are at odds with each other, for whatever reason, what’s important behind those flowers, candy, and dinner, is when the relationship gets back to functioning as it should, because love and forgiveness go deep; it’s the deeper commitment that surpasses those tangibles; it’s knowing this person loves you beyond the messy moments.

Most of us don’t want others to know there’s ever an issue in our relationships.  We don’t want anyone to know we’ve had, or are having, ups and downs like everyone else.  But, we’re human, every single one of us, and we all make mistakes; we all fight that urge of selfishness.  I do believe it isn’t necessary to air every piece of our dirty laundry to the world, just so they know we’re transparent, for I do believe we need to be careful in how we shred our significant others.  I’ve seen more harm happen in relationships because people chose to vent, or be real and transparent, whether it was a couple, friendships, neighbors, co-workers, or within family. Using discernment and discretion is important.

On Valentine’s Day, I think of those who don’t have their significant others any more, whether it’s due to a death, or a relationship that didn’t work out; or perhaps they haven’t met that someone special.  As I’m typing this, I think of the song called, Traces.  There are lots of losses and hurts surrounding this holiday.  Some are still grieving, some are grieving but God and others are helping them cope; some are staying busy, others are trying to get busy; yet still, some don’t know where to turn; some are lonely today, and will be tomorrow.  May we be sensitive to those around us in various circumstances, and offer hope and love.

In the mix of all the secular love surrounding Valentine’s Day, is the spiritual.  The Bible says there’s Someone Who surpasses all human relationships regarding love.  People let us down, whether it’s our friends, neighbors, co-workers, family, or that significant other we just bragged about.  We’re human, that’s our excuse for not holding our tongue.  Christ was also human, and I know it seems way off to even compare ourselves to Christ as an example in how we should live, but that’s what we’re called to do. Because of our humanness, we fail, we fall, but He’s the Standard we can strive to follow.

The spiritual love is much to ponder, it goes deep and wide,  and sometimes it isn’t what we’d prefer, it goes against our grain of self.  We have to be careful, for love can become distorted, twisted, come across as better than.  We’re called to love and forgive.  We read in His Word that we’ll be hated by the world, not loved, for Christ’s sake (John 15:18-25).  We read that not all will be a bed of roses in our walk with Christ.  You may have tangible blessings, but walking with Christ doesn’t mean we will.  Some of our blessings may be how we handle the adversity in our lives, or in the lives of others.  We read that love is more than fluff; it’s self-denial and assertive; it’s active.  It calls for separation; we’re to be different (Matthew 5:13-16; 1 Peter 2:9; 2 Cor 6:14-17).  We’re in the world, but not of it (John 17:13-16).  But, that doesn’t mean we’re to live in seclusion and not have any communication or relationships with nonbelievers (Matthew 28:18-20; Acts 1:8). Paul’s words emphasize the expected change for the believer, and how our association with nonbelievers are opportunities for witness (1 Cor 5:9-10).   Hopefully, we’re different now (not perfect) and are learning and growing in our walks. If we’re living no different than the world, what love are we proclaiming that the world would hate or want?

As Valentine’s Day continues to unfold, I hope everyone does have a beautiful day, regardless of your circumstance in life.  If you receive flowers, candy, and/or go out for dinner, that’s great; enjoy; I love those tangibles as well!  If you’re dealing with messiness in life now, it will pass, because your love is beyond, it goes deeper.  Whatever you’re dealing with today, I pray for better, deeply love-filled moments.  I hope for you love, if not in a romantic way, then in another way.  And most importantly, I hope for you His love, which ultimately surpasses human love.

Earnestly,

Yours

We’re sojourners; we’re pilgrims.  We’re just passing through.  Because we’re strangers.  We’re foreigners, our citizenship is not here. This is not our permanent home, heaven is…a new heaven and new earth will be our new home.

Being a military family, we’ve had a variety of living quarters ranging from small, big, very old, brand new, and almost new; brick, rock, siding; rented, owned or military housing, and we appreciated each house by turning it into a home.  The walls in each home were adorned, and still are, with pictures capturing memories through the years, and other tangible memories are scattered about.  The pictures don’t only capture fun memories, they reflect change and growth, spiritual and otherwise.

I think the oldest house we lived in was at Travis.  The last time we saw it was during a vacation back to the States when we were stationed in Japan.  It was fun walking a bit in the old neighborhood and walking to the park we used to frequent, where we fed the ducks at the pond.  We all talked about many memories during that visit.  Since that visit, we understand those houses no longer exist; they all were demolished.

It didn’t matter where we lived, or if we rented, we sought to take care of each house as though we owned it.  It’s okay to enjoy the beautiful world and we should strive to be good stewards of our dwellings, even putting up some décor; we love on our pets, take care of yards, and strive to be a good neighbor.

I couldn’t help but think of 2 Peter 3, which talks about the Day of the Lord that’s coming, and that one day everything will be burned up.  All the houses we enjoyed and turned into homes will be gone.  Included in this earthly finale is our spiritual assessment of what kind of lives we lived for Christ.  The new heaven and new earth will be better than any home we fixed up here.

Though we enjoy many things in this world, we need to be careful about getting caught up in the worldliness of the world.  There are many things which can pull at us, but we must be diligent and vigilant in our walk, keeping focused on Him.  1 Peter 2:11 says…Beloved, I beseech you as strangers and pilgrims, abstain from fleshly lusts, which war against the soul.  While we’re not to love this world, we’re supposed to be associated with this world-for in associating, we love others as Christ would have us (1 Cor 5:9-10).  If we pull away, don’t interact, don’t help, don’t associate, we miss opportunities to share Him.  Worse, a lack of concern for others indicates what’s in our hearts.  I know I have fallen in this area.  I haven’t taken advantage of an opportunity at hand to be the hands, feet and voice of Christ.  The least I can do is offer my ear, a bit of time…to listen.  Sometimes that’s what the opportunity at hand is for.  So, I need to personally reflect, and we need to encourage each other on our journeys.

In the long run, we’re just passing through this world; this is not our permanent home.  However, in this world we experience and witness various trials and tribulations; some brought on by self, others not, all of which is more reason to reflect and ponder opportunities at hand.  In reflecting, we learn, we grow; but we don’t wallow; we don’t keep looking back so much so that we don’t move forward.  Jesus said to “take heart,” so we keep fighting the fight, we keep going forward.  We fall, but we get up; others fall, but we encourage them to get up.  We know we will never fully overcome all that’s in this world, but we look forward to Hope because Christ said He has overcome the world (John 16:33).

Our citizenship is not in this world, but one day it will be…for one day we will live with God; He will wipe away every tear, and there won’t be any more death, mourning, crying or pain (Rev 21:3-4).  In the meantime, we’ll strive to be good stewards; continue to build memories and aim to be good neighbors.  While followers of Christ are strangers and pilgrims in this world, we’re no longer foreigners and strangers with one another because we’re fellow citizens with God’s people and members of His household, as Eph 2:19-22 says.  Thus, all followers of Christ are His citizens; we share Him as a common Bond; we need to encourage each other on our journeys, knowing that we’re passing through this world together, as strangers and foreigners.  And in doing so, we’re to be mindful of who we are, and why we are; we’re to think and behave differently as we live in this world.  It’s not a judgmental statement, for we will do well to remember how we once lived, how we were once alienated (Eph 2:1-10).

As we sojourn, we look forward to a new, permanent home.

Earnestly,

Yours

Fragrance, fading and drooping; it’s part of life.  If we focus too much on the wrong thing, our outside appearance of withering will override what’s most important…our heart.

Flowers enhance a room’s mood.  When flowers are at their best, the bright light is welcome, and they add cheerfulness to the setting.  Flowers add a coziness and warmth to any room.  When I was looking at them in the store, I was looking for the best bouquet; the one with the least amount of imperfections.  The details were amazing, and their color vibrant.  Once home, I moved them from table to table to see where they looked best.  Sitting on a table not only adds a neat touch to a room, so can their fragrance.  Depending on the light in the room, the flowers look different.  And some varies will last much longer than others.

The brighter the light, the more pronounced their color, so I put them on the kitchen table, which allowed for more outdoor light to come streaming through the blinds. The brighter the light, the more details you can see.  And the details are amazing. You can see God’s handy work down to the last petal.  After a week or so, the bright light shining on the flowers isn’t as welcome, as the flowers start to droop.  The details in the flower start to change color; they fade, they lose their spunk; their fragrance fades.  They simply don’t look like they once did.

Bright light or dim, when we think we’re at our best, the flaws are there.  Our days of our youth may show younger skin, but we never were perfect; some type of flaw was always there.  As we age, we’re not surprised to see another freckle, a new mole, a more defined wrinkle; or a scar that continues to darken.  Our hair starts to turn gray, and gravity is working overtime.  I don’t like change.  I see change every morning I look in the mirror.  Young or old, God sees our imperfections and flaws. We may prefer the dim light to help camouflage our withering, but there’s no getting away from change.  Sure, some lotions may help us fight our natural decline; plus there’s sun blocks we can use; and there are those people who seem to have the better skin types to begin with, but there’s no way we’ll escape the inevitable change that’s coming.

We read that God wants us to be a good steward of what He has given us; even in taking care of ourselves.  And that’s good, we should.  God knows our days; some of us will last longer (live longer) than others, but no matter how much better our petals may appear, they won’t last.  The key is if we’re more consumed about what others think; what we think; if we’re trying to impress others, or please God.  Are we more concerned with the exterior than the interior.  Proverbs 31:30 says charm and beauty is fleeting, but the woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.  Whether in the ground or sitting in a vase, flowers start drooping, they lose their leaves, and eventually die.  So do we.

God’s always looking at the heart, regardless the situation.  And man’s typically looking at the exterior.   1 Samuel 16:7 says:  But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.”

Indeed, Isaiah 40:8 comes to mind.  We whither, we fade, we sag, we have our time; but one thing we know for sure is that God’s Word endures.  Nothing about It changes.  The grass withers and blooms whither, but God’s Word endures.

The good news is that one day we won’t be worried about, or consumed with, physical impairments.  There won’t be any more fading, withering, no tears, mourning, crying; no dying  (Revelation 21:3-4).  Until then, enjoy life, fear the Lord above all else, and do enjoy His pretty creation, including flowers on your table.

Earnestly,

Yours

We have roses growing out front. The thorns are small, but they still hurt, yet they aren’t taking over the pretty petals or fragrance. The bush continues to mature and thrive while the thorns remain.

A thorn is a thorn. We all have thorns for various reasons. Sometimes those thorns are short or long term trials, aches or pains; they can be any kind of affliction coming at us from any direction or source. But God gives us grace; He helps us endure those pains, those trials. Our thorns are seen as a detriment, but they aren’t in the whole of life. They can be a nuisance, and it may take time to understand their value, but God intends them for a reason.

Years ago I had a thorn.  The pain was in my leg and was pretty much constant; it was more constant than it wasn’t.  I would have brief periods when the pain wasn’t as intense, but it was always a constant.   My husband told me he would hear me groan in my sleep; and I remember waking up a several times in tears.  The pain certainly interrupted my quality of sleep.  I’m fairly pain tolerant, but I will admit it wasn’t just annoying, it was rotten at times.  After a couple years, I finally decided to go to the doctor.  He said he didn’t think it was Sciatica, or a disc issue, although no x-rays were taken, nor other tests performed.  I was told I’d just have to deal with the pain and limp.  Motrin or Advil helped relieve some pain, but not entirely.  I’m not one for taking long term pain killers, so the prescribed medication wasn’t an option.

Other than Motrin or Advil, I tried a couple things, one of which were magnets, to help relieve my leg pain.  Amazingly, they worked.  When a friend suggested I try the magnets, I was skeptical.  I hadn’t heard of using magnets for healing, and I figured the doctors would have suggested them had they known of their aided healing or helpfulness.  I gave them a try and they worked.  The pain I had been experiencing roughly six years was subsiding, and I almost couldn’t believe it.  I wore those magnets day and night for about a year.  I hardly ever experience that pain now.  I’m thankful for the relief; but I also remember how I just used to cope with it.  When the pain first started, I admit I didn’t initially think about Paul and his thorn.  As the days, weeks and months passed, I sure thought of Paul; I thought of other people who still have pain.   I thought that if other people could endure some pain, so could I.  Even though that particular pain has eased, no doubt I’ll have other pains, if not due to life’s events, then due to the aging process.

Adam dealt with thorns. God tells Adam why he’ll deal with thorns in Genesis 3:17-19.

Paul asked God three times to remove his thorn, but God left it. God told Paul His grace was sufficient (2 Cor. 12:5-10).

Charles Spurgeon endured many thorns and trials in his life such as chronic pain and more; and his wife was afflicted beyond being able to care for herself.  But Spurgeon’s thorns didn’t overtake his life; he came to see those thorns as blessings, not curses.  Charles Spurgeon said many things relating to his thorns and trials, here are two:

“I dare say the greatest earthly blessing that God can give to any of us is health, with the exception of sickness.”

“I’m afraid that all the grace that I have received from my comfortable and easy times and happy hours might almost lie on a penny, but the good that I have received from my sorrows, my pains and my griefs, is altogether incalculable.”

There are so many other people who come to mind, like Joni Eareckson Tada.  A diving accident left her a quadriplegic in a wheelchair.  She’s shared a lot about that accident, and her frustrations in dealing with her physical impairment; but also how God has used her. Joni paints with her mouth, she sings, she’s authored numerous books and is a spokesperson for the disabled.

I don’t know anyone who enjoys or looks forward to the next thorn;  I sure don’t.  But, what I do hope for within myself is reflection on that painful thorn in my leg, resulting in growth and maturity in the Lord the next time I get poked by a thorn.  We can pray to have a thorn removed, but whether God removes it or not, the result goes back to Him.  Christ wore a painful crown of thorns as He was mocked (Matthew 27:37; Mark 15:16-20). In having a relationship with Jesus, we can look forward to the day when all thorns are gone, for good. Until that time, God gives grace to endure the thorns as we live humbly before Him. Humility is key: It’s God’s strength that’s made perfect through our weaknesses. It goes back to God. It’s not about us.

Earnestly,

Yours

Your past will influence who you are, but it doesn’t have to dictate who you become.  I like those words, but one important addition I’d like to add to that phrase is that even though I didn’t know it at the time, I believe without a doubt that the Lord was protecting me, was watching over me then.  I give all credit to God for where I am now.

I was barely shy of 5 years old when my birth mother sat me on her knee at the kitchen table and told me she would be taking me and my siblings to Sunshine Acres. She and my birth father had already separated, and the man she ended up marrying didn’t want us around. Thus, 13 days prior to my 5th birthday, we arrived at Sunshine Acres, with our little packed bags.

I was well aware of the trouble my birth parents had.  I remember the fights, the drinking, the yelling; other women.  I remember one specific time when my birth father was so upset he hit the wall with his fist, leaving a hole.  The quick and superficial remedy to cover that outrage was a picture that was placed over the blemished spot.

I’ve been back to visit Sunshine Acres four times.  The last time was when my husband and I took our young adult children for a visit.  Miss Dingman was no longer alive, but we met with Carol, her daughter, who took us around, and showed us a video, honoring the legacy of Miss Dingman, her husband and Sunshine Acres.

The dining hall. The basic structure looked the same, although inside had been painted and redone. I remember how all the children would line up each morning before school, walk down the dirt road to the dining hall for breakfast, and then pick up a brown paper sack lunch for school, which were all lined up and organized. Then we’d head to school on buses.

The chapel pretty much looked the same.  Every Sunday, the children would walk down the dirt road to the chapel. I remember being given a penny to put in the offering plate.

This was the house we lived in during our stay.  I remembered the layout in the Saguaro house, although I recognized the front door had been closed off and moved to another entry point.  The rooms were modernized; the beds now hung from the ceiling and are quite pretty. As we walked through the Saguaro house, I recalled many other things…like the wild donkeys that used to roam around…making their noises, and the sound of doves all the time.

Everyone has a story.  Your story may be better, the same, or worse than mine.  Yet, even the best of families or circumstances have flaws, imperfections; everyone has some type of dysfunction, simply because we’re human.

My young life did not start out very good, and there are additional details at that time which add to the equation.  Because of circumstances, I know I grew up fast at a young age; I saw, heard and experienced things children shouldn’t.  After I left Sunshine Acres, there were additional twists and turns; there were mistakes.  The best part of my long and winding story, is Spiritual. I firmly believe the Lord not only watched over me, He Spiritually rescued me from myself…by saving me when His time was right, about 23 years ago.  2 Cor. 5:17 says ‘Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here.’  I am grateful for His saving love and mercy, through His Son.  I have at times wondered why God didn’t step in sooner than He did, but His timing is not my timing. I am thankful for the goodness He bestows.  Looking back, I believe, and know without a doubt, it is because of His grace and mercy that I did not end up a total basket case.  As John 9:25 says, and I too can say…’One thing I do know. I was blind but now I see!’  We can move forward, not hold grudges and hate.  It can be difficult and a real challenge, sometimes it’s easier to say than do, but God wants us to forgive.  If we don’t, it’ll eat at us, permeate our thoughts; it will hold us captive. It may not result in relationship recovery, or even should, but you will have rest and peace of mind and heart as you move forward from the past; in all of life, in all circumstances.  It’s a peace He told His disciples about in John 14;  it’s ‘a peace which transcends all understanding’,  Phil. 4:7.

My past had an influence on me, and I know it is God Who Overcomes; Who helps us overcome, and helps me every day…as I rely on Him.  1 Peter 5:7 says ‘to cast our cares on Him’.  God is stronger than us, and in looking to Him, He helps us not dwell on past circumstances; rather, we grow from them.  Following Christ is the Only remedy to cover a blemished life.  In following Him, it will take time to learn and grow.  But His remedy isn’t superficial; it’s real and ever lasting; it’s permanent.  He was the unblemished Lamb Who died to make my life spotless; Who took away my sins.  As imperfect as I still am, I thank the Lord for where I am today.

Earnestly,

Yours

http://www.gty.org/Blog/B160217

When I read the blog written by Jeremiah Johnson, from Grace To You, I very much identified.  It’s part of my own testimony.

I did exactly what the one part talks about regarding ‘false salvation’. I walked the isle, repeated a prayer, got baptized…all for the wrong reason. I even knew it was for the wrong reason at the time. I had been teased by another in the youth group at church about not being saved–I was told it was so easy…thus, I eventually went forward. I don’t mention that part of the equation because I hold a grudge against any individual, rather, it was the blindness of the surrounding circumstances of that person and myself at the time; that, and the fact my time for salvation hadn’t come yet.

From the moment of my ‘false profession’, it was chalked up as “I did it, I did what everyone else had done or was doing’…”I got saved”. There was no evidence anything had changed, then, or for many years to come. There was no growth, or even desire. Until…one morning I was at ladies fellowship, a morning get-together I almost didn’t go to; and I felt the speaker was talking directly to me. There was an overwhelming sense of conviction, guilt, remorse, at who I was, in light of Who Christ Is. There’s much more to all this, but I will say that my life has not been the same since I became a follower of Christ…for 23 years now. It’s not a perfect life, but my desire is to follow Him. I like how R.C. puts it: “We don’t enter Christianity until Christ enters us. It isn’t about turning over a new leaf; it’s about starting over with new life in Him. Practices, precepts, performances; it’s a relationship with a real person.”

Your salvation may not have happened just as mine did.  I know everyone’s testimony varies…because the Lord works in different ways, at different ages; and our sins vary;  Yet, salvation in the Lord is the same when we are born again; and our sins, no matter how hideous, are washed away.  In those ways, we are one and the same in the Lord, for we all belong to Him.  In belonging to Him, everyone who belongs to Christ belongs to everyone else who belongs to Christ.

2 Cor. 5:17 Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!

Earnestly,

Yours

In all our years of military assignments, I can’t think of a perfect church we were a part of…whether it involved stealing from church funds, adultery, lying, gossip, idolatry, swearing, disrespecting the Lord, hating each other and strangers…we’re human and fail. But, that doesn’t mean we abuse grace so we can live as we want (Romans 6).

Years ago, we were in a church where one lady in particular had it in for another. She gossiped and got listeners in her court; while others ignored her. Things kept brewing. The situation escalated and the ring leader talked to the pastor, thinking she’d have the pastor on her side. The pastor initially sided with the accuser, since other women agreed with said accuser. He said his initial rationale was that surely if more than one lady had a problem with the one being accused, she must be problematic. The said accuser talked and talked, making it sound like the accused was hideous in character. The accused pretty much kept to herself, but remained nice; nor did she run to the pastor, trying to defend herself. The pastor eventually talked to the accuser and accuse, separately, and concluded the problem lie with said accuser and her attitude, and things were not exactly as she portrayed. This whole saga ended when the accuser apologized from the pulpit–in front of the congregation in the evening church service. No names were addressed, but everyone pretty much knew what was going on since it was a small church. The pastor added, that the accused said an apology from the pulpit wasn’t necessary, or even an apology, just change and stop that behavior.

This type of thing goes on in churches, and affects any age, for various reasons. So, what do we do when someone purposefully hates and spews venom? Stop, breathe, and try to understand there may be some underlying issues with her, him or them. There are lots of reasons why…it could be something you’ve said was taken out of context, it was relayed on wrong, or they don’t know the full picture; it could be because of what’s going on within her, him or them, and you’re the target; it could be simply a clash of personalities. Sometimes both parties are at fault, but not always. Sometimes issues work themselves out, other times not. Forever forgiving doesn’t mean to only embrace certain Scriptures, while ignoring others. Use discernment; keep going, keep busy; don’t hold grudges.

We are emotional creatures, and often it seems women can be more brutal, although men can use their tongues the same way.  I know out of frustration, in the heat of the moment, I have worded something I could have worded differently.  I may not have meant it any differently than when i first said IT, but just worded it a different way.  It can be difficult to hold one’s response; I know, I’ve been there.  It’s also difficult to not offer my two cents on a situation, especially if I’ve been on the receiving end of said individual someone else is spouting about.

What to do when someone’s habitual with talk; when someone keeps the pot stirred, and participators are in abundance…one lady shared these words she found on the topic:

-Don’t associate yourself with one who is a known gossip
-When someone starts to gossip — change the subject
-If you are not part of the problem or part of the solution, stay out of it
-If you have fallen into the bad habit of gossiping — ask God to change your heart
-Don’t remain idle

I find that in keeping busy, it helps me stay focused on that which I should be focused.

Proverbs 20:19; Proverbs 26:20-22; Titus 2:3-5

Earnestly,

Yours

When the time was right, Christ was born to die.

Christ was chosen before the creation of the world: 1 Peter 1:20-21 He was chosen before the creation of the world, but was revealed in these last times for your sake. Through him you believe in God, who raised him from the dead and glorified him, and so your faith and hope are in God. Christ is our Hope, to Whom we cling and know.

Mary was the chosen vessel for this assignment. She didn’t fully understand, but she said, “My soul glorifies the Lord and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior…”: Luke 1:46-56